Who Ordered The "Sonic The Hedgehog" Movie Trailer?

Riddle me this: What’s blue and white, has weird people teeth, and should have stayed in the 90’s? WRONG! It’s not Will Smith’s Genie. It’s Sonic The Hedgehog! Although I am sure that not a single, solitary person alive on planet earth asked for it, we’re getting a feature length, live-action movie about a SEGA video game character whose primary character trait is that he’s a fast runner.

Maybe I’m showing my age by not knowing all of Sonic’s particular charms and skills. But the premise seems like a stretch. Good thing Paramount Pictures has been doing their Pilates. They found a way to stretch it out like this.

SONIC THE HEDGEHOG is a live-action adventure comedy based on the global blockbuster videogame franchise from Sega that centers on the infamously brash bright blue hedgehog. The film follows the (mis)adventures of Sonic as he navigates the complexities of life on Earth with his newfound – human – best friend Tom Wachowski (James Marsden). Sonic and Tom join forces to try and stop the villainous Dr. Robotnik (Jim Carrey) from capturing Sonic and using his immense powers for world domination. The film also stars Tika Sumpter and Ben Schwartz as the voice of Sonic.

Here’s the trailer.

Oh good. Just as over-the-top cartoonish character aficionado Johnny Depp’s career started its death spiral, Jim Carrey was right there waiting in the wings to take his place. Looks like Jim’s pivoted his artistic intentions away from creating ghoulish caricatures of the Washington elite and turned them toward creating a ghoulish caricature of himself. Fair is fair.

I have to ask: Can this movie be any good based on the just the strength of Sonic trolling everyone by leaving supercharged, regenerating hedgehog dicks everywhere? Probably not. But at least now Detective Pikachu has a worthy foe when it comes time for the inevitable crossover event Blue Alien vs. Yellow Predator.

Pic: YouTube

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