Americans are some of the most self-conscious lovers in the world

A survey of 2,000 Americans saw kisses on the neck voted as officially the biggest turn-on, but having their partner say those three little words came out a close second.

According to the findings, a partner simply saying “I like that” in bed was revealed to be seriously arousing.

The study, conducted by sex toy retailer, also found that 76 per cent of Americans like their partner giving them a little verbal reassurance in bed.

Interestingly, getting reassurance came out as the number one turn-on for men, whereas it was ranked in second place by American women.

When it comes to turn-offs it was also revealed that nearly one in four women reported that going down on their partner was something they didn’t enjoy, with more adventurous sexual acts also revealed to be polarise the genders.


  • Neck kisses
  • My partner telling me 'I like that'
  • My partner undressing me
  • My partner going down on me
  • Undressing my partner
  • Nibbling my ear
  • Lingerie
  • Eye contact during sex
  • Going down on my partner
  • Being teased
  • Sex toys
  • Dirty talk in English
  • Partner doing a striptease
  • Being dominated
  • Partner being rough
  • My partner spanking me
  • My partner pulling my hair
  • Biting
  • Having to be quiet and sneaky ('don't wake the roommate' etc.)
  • Role-playing


  • Poor hygiene
  • Being mean
  • Being rude to waitstaff
  • Eating with mouth open
  • Being flirty with other people
  • Talking about exes
  • Being cocky
  • Talking too much/not listening
  • Dressing poorly
  • Baby talk
  • Insecurity
  • Long fingernails
  • Wearing too much cologne/perfume
  • Being cheap
  • Lack of confidence
  • Body hair
  • Being too 'handsy' in public
  • Bad driver
  • Poor taste in shoes
  • Calling me pet names in public

But in a cruel twist of fate having confidence was ranked as one of the top non-sexual turn-ons, along with being affectionate, making them feel appreciated and intelligent.

Fred Petrenko of said: “The study showed that non-physical affections are the biggest turn-ons for everyone.


  • My partner telling me “I like that”: 78 per cent
  • My partner going down on me: 78 per cent
  • Undressing my partner: 78 per cent
  • Going down on my partner: 76 per cent
  • Neck kisses: 76 per cent


  • Neck kisses: 82 per cent
  • My partner telling me "I like that": 74 per cent
  • My partner undressing me: 68 per cent
  • My partner going down on me: 67 per cent
  • Undressing my partner: 63 per cent

“'All we need is love' is as true today as it's always been.”

The survey found 37 is the age when people are at their kinkiest overall.


  • Smelling good: 69 per cent
  • Being affectionate: 64 per cent
  • Making me feel appreciated: 61 per cent
  • Dressing nicely: 46 per cent
  • Intelligence: 45 per cent
  • Confidence: 43 per cent
  • Generosity: 39 per cent
  • Active listening: 39 per cent
  • Playing with my hair: 34 per cent
  • Being taller than me: 28 per cent

Respondents said they are noticeably turned on three times every day, with one in five saying it’s actually more times than that.

And it’s not necessarily in the evening when we feel this way, with the average person saying they’re most likely to be turned on at 2:46pm.

“Not surprisingly, sex toys are one of the major turn-ons for many couples,” continue Petrenko.

“We encourage people to experiment more in the bedroom for a happier and sexier life.”

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