A happy marriage can now include cheating, according to cheaters
Human sexuality is an ever-unfolding mystery, but two new books aim to shed some light on it. Here, psychiatrist Kenneth Rosenberg, author of “Infidelity: Why Men and Women Cheat” (Da Capo Press), and physician Erika Schwartz, author of “The Intimacy Solution” (Post Hill Press), share some surprising facts and figures about sex, love and divorce.
If your partner cheats, you’ll probably never know
“Ninety percent of people who cheat — their spouses never find out about it,” says Rosenberg. He also notes a reason why infidelity can be hard to detect: 50 percent of those who cheat say they’re happy in their marriage.
More and more women are cheating
Two decades ago, roughly 10 percent of married women cheated, but that number has increased to 15 percent. “Women increasingly have options, and feel both sexual agency and social freedoms,” says Rosenberg.
But divorce is on the wane
Schwartz notes that the divorce rate among couples under age 50 has steadily declined since 2009. She credits this to the younger generation being more realistic about long-term relationships and the fleeting nature of passion. “[Millennials are] more honest with themselves,” she says.
Men go through ‘the change,’ too
Andropause — the male version of menopause characterized by a gradual decline in testosterone starting in the early 40s — shares some behavioral similarities to its female counterpart. Along with a diminished libido, “It’s like a decline in emotional depth,” says Schwartz. “They [can] become depressed … couch potatoes, sitting at home and drinking beer.”
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