{"id":223191,"date":"2023-10-09T16:00:37","date_gmt":"2023-10-09T16:00:37","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/allworldreport.com\/?p=223191"},"modified":"2023-10-09T16:00:37","modified_gmt":"2023-10-09T16:00:37","slug":"i-refuse-to-get-married-without-a-prenup-my-fiancee-is-furious","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/allworldreport.com\/lifestyle\/i-refuse-to-get-married-without-a-prenup-my-fiancee-is-furious\/","title":{"rendered":"I refuse to get married without a prenup – my fianc\u00e9e is furious"},"content":{"rendered":"
A man has sparked furious debate after he revealed he told his fianc\u00e9e he refused to get married without a prenup after he proposed because he makes more money than his bride-to-be.\u00a0<\/p>\n
The unnamed 29-year-old man took to Reddit to share that he and his 27-year-old fianc\u00e9e ended up a fiery argument while planning their wedding because he demanded a prenup.\u00a0<\/p>\n
He noted that his partner slammed him for ‘not trusting’ her as he added that he just wanted to protect himself in the event that the two split because he makes more money than she does and owns their home.<\/p>\n
On the AITAH\u00a0(Am I The A**hole) subreddit,\u00a0the 29-year-old questioned if he was in the wrong for asking his partner to sign a\u00a0prenuptial agreement since she worked in retail and he was employed by a ‘well-known tech company.’<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
A man has sparked furious debate after he revealed he told his fianc\u00e9e he refused to get married without a prenup because he makes more money than his bride-to-be<\/p>\n
The man began by sharing that he owns the house the pair lives in and pays more than 50 per cent of the bills.\u00a0<\/p>\n
In his post, he says his partner works in retail and doesn’t make as much as she did, but he ‘doesn’t mind financially supporting her.’\u00a0<\/p>\n
‘I (M29) proposed to my fianc\u00e9e (F27) a few months ago. We’d taken to trip to Italy and I proposed over a romantic dinner, call it cheesy, but she loved it and gave me an enthusiastic yes,’ he explained.<\/p>\n
‘Ever since we returned home she’s been absolutely obsessed with planning every single detail, sometimes to the extent of calling me at work to confirm colors or styles of certain d\u00e9cor pieces.\u00a0<\/p>\n
‘I work in tech, it’s a pretty well-known company and my job pays decently. My girlfriend works in retail, she obviously doesn’t make as much as me, but I don’t mind financially supporting her.’\u00a0<\/p>\n
The 29-year-old added that the conversation surrounding a prenup came up while they were eating dinner as they discussed the legalities surrounding their wedding.\u00a0<\/p>\n
As she described her special day, he decided to chime in.\u00a0<\/p>\n
He added: ‘Towards the end of our discussion I make a comment about prenups, something along the lines of, “I think we should file for a prenup at the same time we’re filing for our license.”\u00a0As soon as I finished saying this, I could see my fianc\u00e9e’s stomach drop, her entire demeanor changed and she held an expression somewhere between angry and hurt.\u00a0<\/p>\n
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The 29-year-old man took to Reddit to share that he and his 27-year-old fianc\u00e9e entered a fiery argument while planning their wedding because he demanded a prenup (stock image)<\/p>\n
‘She explained that we didn’t need a prenup, and quote, “It’s just pointless.”‘<\/p>\n
His soon-to-be wife noted that she didn’t understand the point of singing a prenup if they planned to be married forever.\u00a0<\/p>\n
However, the 29-year-old insisted it was just because it would make him ‘feel more comfortable.’<\/p>\n
‘She seemed visibly upset by this and countered with, “Do you not trust me”. I explained that it had nothing to do with trust, it was simply about having it in the event something were to happen,’ he added.\u00a0<\/p>\n
‘She snapped saying that I was being unreasonable and if I didn’t trust her to just say so I raised my voice and said, “I do trust you, I just want the prenup as a safety measure since I make more than you”.\u00a0<\/p>\n
‘She looked shocked, and said nothing, but I kept going, “A prenup makes me feel more comfortable, if you don’t want to sign one then fine, but I can’t get married without it.”‘<\/p>\n
After he shared his true feelings, his fianc\u00e9e stormed out the door with her car keys in hand.\u00a0<\/p>\n
‘I’ve been texting and calling, but no response, the only sort of contact I’ve received was a message from her mom explaining that she would be staying with her until things cooled down,’ he said.<\/span><\/p>\n ‘I feel bad for what I said, and I do regret the way I acted, however, I don’t feel like my request was too much.’<\/span><\/p>\n At the end of the post, the man questioned if he was the a**hole for asking\u00a0for a prenup.\u00a0<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n People on the web were divided, with many people agreeing with the man and pushing him to stand his ground<\/p>\n People on the web were divided, with many people agreeing with the man and pushing him to stand his ground.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n One person said: ‘Prenuptial can also eliminate spousal support depending on the state. I’m sure he is aware of what a prenuptial does.\u00a0And would talk to a lawyer. There is zero reason why he shouldn’t ask for a prenuptial if he has significant wealth going into the marriage.’<\/span><\/p>\n Someone else added: ‘<\/span>OP owns the house, and has a career that’s way better than hers — he works in a tech company and got himself a mortgage and a house; she’s 27 and works in retail. Nothing wrong with protecting his downside in the case of a divorce when they’re on very different financial tracks. It’s not like she stayed home, supported him, and raised their kids.’\u00a0<\/p>\n ‘Not the a**hole. Prenups can be hurtful but are necessary. No one ever gets married thinking “I can’t wait to get reamed by someone who swore they loved me but now hates my very existence.” Ya know what? That happens a lot. Protect yourself. If she can’t appreciate that, then she’s not the one for you,’ another wrote.\u00a0<\/p>\n One person wrote: ‘I feel this is an issue that should of been discussed prior to a proposal, but that being said NTA. I think far too many people don’t protect themselves in a time we over 50 per cent of marriages end with the contractual ability of divorce.’<\/p>\n Another user added: ‘If there’s one thing I wish I did before getting divorced after 25 years together, it’s a prenuptial agreement. The split started amicably but when we got round to splitting the finances, she royally screwed me.’\u00a0<\/p>\n However, others claimed that he was in the wrong, and shouldn’t have asked for the agreement after he proposed.\u00a0<\/p>\n Someone else commented: ‘Sounds like he might think a prenup is a “you can’t take my money” form you drop off with your marriage license instead of a contract that’s negotiated for the benefit of both parties. And it sounds like his fianc\u00e9 might think that too based on her response. I agree it’s totally fine for him to want one and ask for it, but I don’t think either of them are aware of what one really is.’<\/p>\n ‘Sounds to me like OP wants his earnings to remain his and not theirs. If I was his fianc\u00e9 I would be rethinking this marriage. Financial abuse by the higher earner is not uncommon,’ another user wrote.\u00a0<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n However, others claimed that he was in the wrong and shouldn’t have asked for the agreement after he proposed<\/p>\n ‘I think OP is TA just for how throwing this out there without doing any research or giving it any thought. He’s completely clueless about how the process works, and he never stopped to think how this could be a sensitive issue. It’s very possible that for someone in his position as an upper middle-class earner who isn’t super wealthy, a prenup doesn’t make much sense and certainly isn’t worth trashing a valuable relationship over,’ one Redditor said.<\/p>\n ‘I make quite a bit more than my wife, but I never thought about a prenup because I think of us as a team and it’s not like I came into our marriage with a huge amount of assets. Most of what we earn is going to be spent or put into the mortgage and retirement. Maybe OP shouldn’t be marrying someone who he doesn’t view as a true partner. OP brought this on himself by being thoughtless, selfish, and most importantly, dumb.’\u00a0<\/p>\n Another user asked: ‘Why is this the first time you’ve mentioned one? This is the sort of thing you talk about while you’re dating not after you’re engaged. No wonder she was blindsided.’\u00a0<\/p>\n Someone else said: “You’re the a**hole. One must go into a marriage with a partnership approach. Your idea of protecting your income differential is greedy and stupid. If you get divorced, would you be fine with your ex billing you for her time, say, raising the kids?’<\/p>\n ‘You’re the a**hole. I get wanting a prenup, but\u00a0I also think you absolutely should have spoken about this well before the proposal. What did you think would happen when you brought it up like this? Also, have you discussed kids? Health? Division of labor? Does she do more at home than you?’ a Redditor chimed in.\u00a0<\/p>\n One person wrote: ‘You’re the a**hole for springing this on her for the first time after you already got engaged. Before you proposed there should have been conversations – and mutual agreement – on topics including, but not limited to: prenup, cost of wedding and who pays, to have kids or not, how many, what if one person wants to be a SAHP, finances, goals, etc.<\/p>\n ‘You’ve entered into your engagement without considering your now-fianc\u00e9e an equal partner who deserves up front communication.’\u00a0<\/p>\n Another said: ‘You’re the a**hole. There’s nothing fundamentally wrong with wanting a prenup,\u00a0in fact I recommend them, but it’s not something that you casually drop over dinner well after the proposal. This is a deal breaker that should’ve been discussed when you started getting serious.<\/span><\/p>\n ‘Saying it after the fact comes off not only as you not trusting her, but as you purposely waiting to drop this bomb in fear that she might say no.’\u00a0<\/p>\n ‘You’re the a**hole, while getting a prenup may not be a bad idea depending on whatever assets you may have, I think you brought it up at a poor moment. You guys are already engaged, have you not spoken about what your finances will look like together yet? Financial problems are the number one cause of divorce, this is definitely a topic you both need to be on the same page as,’ one commenter weighed in.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n