LUCY BAKER felt nervous on her son's first day of school. She’s been through this day twice before but this time was different.
She had a point to prove and she was wearing a stunning bright, gold, sparkly dress.
The response from parents was pretty normal – most of the other parents were busy dropping off their kids on their first day.
But one parent looked at Lucy, from Lincolnshire, with a big smile and said: “You did it.”
The response from parents online was even better.
“I had messages from other mums saying you’ve inspired me to do the same.” Lucy said.
“The gold dress was a statement to remind others that judging is not cool and for me to celebrate me and my son.”
These comments were a far cry from what parents had said four years before when she discovered she was pregnant.
She said: “I had a positive pregnancy test at the age of 42 and after the initial ‘OMG I’m pregnant’ – which I had with all my pregnancies – I was delighted.”
Both Lucy at her partner Dan, 39, a production manager were delighted with the news.
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“That delight soon turned into am I doing the right thing after I was faced with ‘risk, risk, risk’ online and some negativity from others.”
It seems many mothers are choosing to have pregnancies later on in life.
In 2019 the number of women aged 45 and over giving birth was at its highest since records began according to the Office of National Statistics (ONS).
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Despite the negativity and the health concerns Lucy's third pregnancy went well and she was well versed in the entire process.
Lucy had her first child, Nancy, 12, when she was 34 and her second child, Ivy, 10, at 37.
“ I loved the pregnancy. I felt confident, my other kids were excited and doing it again in my 40s was a lovely thing.”
And like any good mother Lucy made sure to take all precautions necessary to make sure her baby was safely delivered.
“The pregnancy was lovely – the best one I had. I felt really intune with my body and made sure I rested if I needed to – not easy with two young girls, but I was kind to myself and everything went well.”
“My son (Rocky) was born a week over his due date and I was 43,” she said with pride."
But the judgement on having a child later on in life kept on coming.
“I thought you’d had enough of nappies.” someone said.
Another asked: “Was it a mistake?”
“But you’ll be 47 when the baby starts school.” a fellow mum exclaimed.
And that was the one comment Lucy couldn't let go, the one that stuck with her throughout her pregnancy and thereafter.
And so the idea of the gold dress was born. Lucy devised a fabulous plan to truly stick it to the haters.
She said: “Instead of it dragging me down, it lit me up and made me think, I’ll show um.”
“I wore the gold dress to a talk in the summer – I was on the panel. I was talking to the audience and after telling them a bit about my journey, I suggested that I wear the dress when dropping my son off for his first day of school in September.”
“The audience of women all said they loved it. And so, I committed to wearing it, and I did.”
Lucy looked absolutely stunning on her son’s first day of school when it finally came around, but the dress was more than just getting dolled up it was a statement.
“It was more than that – it was to say; stop judging other women for their life choices and let’s celebrate motherhood and those who do it their way.”
“I wore the dress today to say: Thanks for your (unhelpful) comments, but we did it. You do you. Why does age matter? Refrain from judging others for their choices/lifestyle/life. Older mums rock. Stop caring about what others think of you, put sequins on and have a great day.”
Now, Lucy is continuing to inspire others, turning her experience into a positive with her blog.
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And to other mums who are having a child at any time in their lives.
She says: “I will say this; ignore others if they react negatively to your news and surround yourself with people who champion you.”
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